Satisfaction. For a lot of people this seems like an unreachable end. I recently had a thought: that a person's 'ability to be satisfied' is a great measure of how they'll do in relationships.Let's talk about men first. Men are frontier adventurers, hard workers, builders, leaders, managers. And with this, there's a lot of room for dissatisfaction. We can become obsessed about things, to the extent that they overpower us. A complaint women have about men is that they don't give themselves to their wives... they don't share their lives. Often we're too busy thinking about the next dollar we'll make, the problems at work, investments, etc. And that stuff is all good, and should be thought about... but are we ever satisfied? Can we just lean back and say, "amongst this chaos and stress, I'm doing ok. I'm fortunate to be where I am, and I am well. I can have some peace, rest, and enjoy what I have: what my hands have made, or what has been given to me".
I'm not saying that men should be passive slackers who do nothing but smoke the joints they're thankful for. But in all our pursuit of happiness let's not fail to be happy. And every once in a while let's pause from being students, artisans, managers, laborers, warriors... and enjoy the God-given delight of being fathers, husbands, and men.
OK, now for the Ladies. Many cunning, sly women have become very good at getting their way. Through persuasion they manipulate people to accommodate their needs. And when they don't get their way they let you know about it. But here's the thing: when you're the center of your own universe, you never find satisfaction. I don't know about other guys, but I'd hate being in a relationship with such a person. One of the things that I want to avoid at all costs is being married to a woman who nags and complains and brings me grief. I'd seriously go nuts.
Are you ladies able to stop stressing about the valid stresses you have in your life? Do you have control over your emotions and attitude? No one's life is perfect, but are you able to accept what you have and have a positive loving attitude? Amongst the pain and heartache, are you able to encourage others, care for them, and be a life-giver? Or maybe we need to back up a bit and remind you that life isn't about you. I don't know Britney Spears' heart... but from her actions it looks like she's convinced that life is all about her. She has the means to do all that you other selfish girls want so badly. Partying, marriage, fame, beauty, having kids, and everything that her heart desires. She's living like solomon in the book of Ecclesiastes. And just like Him I think she's dissatisfied... sometimes we need to stop and access. Girls, think of what it is right now that you want the most- what you long for and look for. Will it satisfy you in the way that you think it will? Or are you building up false hopes, while missing the mark?
Men don't marry you in order to make your every wish come true. They want you because you're beautiful, you bring them joy, and because they want to enjoy life with you. OK, and maybe they want to give you stuff and romance you... but if you think that your man should satisfy your every need, and if you try to make that happen, you will suck the life out of that man until he wants to die. I have a picture in my head of Samson in heaven, singing, "if you want to be happy for the rest of your life..."(The problem isn't beauty, it's selfishness. Many pretty girls, through praise from others and lifelong attention, get the idea reinforced over and over again that it's ok to be selfish. "Marry not these", says Yoda.)
So here's the long and short of it. If men can find satisfaction, maybe then they'll be freed up to give themselves to their women in the true partnership they desire. And if women can find satisfaction, maybe then they'll be the pleasant, gentle, kindhearted women their men want to come home to after a stressful day.
Satisfaction is not about how much you have, how much you gain or lose. It's an attitude, it's a choice. And I believe that it's a choice that's a lot easier if you first come to grips with the fact that God loves you, and then begin to walk in that love. I truly think that contentment and healthy relationships are gifts from God... because in all the trying, persevering, and struggling we do towards these things, I think it's something we can't earn... it's grace.
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Phew, I could make this a whole lot longer, as I have tons more to say, and a lot more I feel I should explain. If you have questions/comments, just leave a comment... I could write more later.
1 comments:
wow, the part for the ladies is a lot longer than the part for the men.
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